Suck It Up And Deal

Have you ever seen a dog that has been chasing its own tail around and around in a circle and suddenly discovers that it has managed to catch it? That look of confusion and shock and total bewilderment as to what has happened? And you know the dog is wondering how the heck it ended up with a nasty hunk of fur in its mouth when it was chasing this wonderful glimpse of utopia just a moment before. Right now I am spitting fur and turning slowly in circles trying to make sense of everything. This week has been the standard chaos of getting ready for the return of school, only with the added enjoyment of having to unpack an entire preschool classroom inbetween meetings and home visits and more meetings and calling parents and reviewing files and more meetings. Unpacking a standard elementary school classroom inolves probably a dozen boxes, a few tables, some files, and desks. Preschool, we are like your grandmother who comes to visit for a week but brings enough crap to stay until the end of the decade. We had literally over fifty boxes not to mention all of the equipment and oversized items that would nto fit into boxes. Imagine trying to keep up to 12 young preschoolers entertained for 4 hours a day five days a week for 9 months out of the year in a single room without television, without DVDs, and while instructing them in meeting a whole laundry list of goals. It takes a LOT of stuff. Our art supplies alone fill two cupboards and three drawers and we have more somewhere. I also had the pleasure of assembling several items, and let's just say that when they fall apart I pray no children are in the area. My building skills are relegated to towers of wooden blocks that teeter and fall when a child breathes on them. School starts Tuesday morning and our classroom is not ready. It will be in "fake it" ready mode by the time the bell rings, after I arrive at 6:30am and work my butt off, but it will not be anywhere near where it should be. At this point it is the best we can do and any complaints can be directed to anyone but me. I worked my butt off and endured two autonomic crashes to get the room even functional. Besides, the first week is chaos no matter how well you plan and how perfectly every toy is on every shelf and every picture on every wall. It is about getting to know the children, establishing a routine, and calming down the incredibly protective and concerned parents (I understand that they are giving me their children for 4 hours a day and I really am honored, I take my responsibility very seriously, and I will do almost anything to make the transition easier but hovering in the room the entire first week - so not helping here!). I do need to find or create our picture schedule as soon as possible and get some picture symbols out for children to use. Fine details, like labeling the centers and toy shelves, can be done during the first few weeks. I am working with a new teacher and a new assistant who have not done this before - I am only one woman! :) Besides, I really want to get to know my little ones more than I want to worry about having the pictures on the shelves or the schedule just right. I would rather establish a great relationship with them from the beginning than have an immaculate and exactly organized room. I can organize, label, and "pretty up" the room anytime but I can only form that inital bond with them once. I have a great group of kids this year and I am so excited. I do wish I had taken Spanish in school instead of German because I don't forsee needing to order a beer or a prostitute anytime soon (the extend of my German - bad teacher!) but I could really use the ability to talk with my little ones!
Along the lines of having to just suck it up and deal I finally made an appointment with a hem./onc. The first reason is because my current primary doctor is holding my rat poison (coumadin) hostage until I have a PT/INR done because I am slightly (two months) overdue. Details, details. It is just too inconvenient to drive 45 minutes each way for a fingerstick, especially when he can not get the blasted level stable anyway. This doctor is ten minutes way from where I live and hopefully can get things balanced. Second reason is the fact that no matter how hard I use my magical thinking I cannot make the lumps and bumps disappear. My ribs hurting is getting a little annoying when I am trying to work in the classroom and I need to know that it will not progress to the point where it makes it too hard to lift children. I also would really like an answer as to what these things are, but that might be like asking for the winning lotto ticket at this point. So as much as I want to just ignore them and pretend they are not there I need to address the issue. Summer break was nice but it is time to get back into life.