Breathe, Breathe

In just about two hours the bell at school will ring and hundreds of children will come pouring through the doors whether we are ready or not. I have a sinking feeling that I am going to be leaning more towards the "not" section of that last statement. There are still boxes in the classroom that I need to unpack or at leat shove somewhere this morning to give the illusion that we are organized and unpacked. There are no pictures on any of the bulletin boards, there is no picture schedule unless I find last years and fudge it with that one for the first few days, there are few pictre symbols, and I will be scrambling to label cubbies this morning. I am not yet familiar with the kids IEPs and will be doing good if I can keep their name's straight. Have I mentioned that I am a perfectionist and that I need to be in total control at all times? I have no words to explain how much this is bothering me, the lack of organization, the fact that so much is unfinished, and the fact that today is going to be so much more than organized chaos and there is not a single darn thing I can do about it. Perhaps if I had not had to unpack an entire classroom wile attending so many meetings while trying to orient the new afternoon teacher while working with an assistant who seems nice enough but most likely does not know on which end of a child to put a diaper let alone how to owkr with children who ahve special needs while trying to organize my files and information while trying to contact parents while schedling and doing home visits everything would have gotten done. This is just my second year ever teaching and last year, well that was trial by fire. Yet no one remembers this except me and now not only am I treading water alone I am supposed to teach everyone I work with how to swim. Has anyone seen my floaties? I am sure once I can fall into a routine and get organized I will feel much better but right now, when my little ones cry for their mommy this morning, inside I will be doing the same thing. :o) My goal for today is to breathe and to enjoy whatever happens and to get to know these beautiful, wonderful, one-of-a-kind children that have been entrusted to me. When I focus on them, the other stuff does not seem very important at all.